It is hard to believe that it has been eight years since losing dad to suicide. Much has happened in the last eight years, all of which my dad hasn't been a part of. I think that's what hurts the most. While we talk about my dad often, it doesn't replace the fact that he is no longer here. This year's anniversary seems to be hitting harder than it has in a while. Maybe it's the after-Christmas blues when the dust settles and there is little to ...
Why it’s impossible to understand their why.
The infamous, "Why?" Any survivor of a suicide loss knows how a word as simple as, "why" takes on more meaning in the aftermath of a suicide. The word can be consuming as you diligently work to uncover the reason "why" your loved one felt that life was too hard to go on. It's exhausting. You find a piece of the puzzle only to then realize how many more are missing. There is never a sense of accomplishment. Every answer seems to lead to a new ...
I wish you would have told me before you took your life…
This week we welcome guest blogger, Cheryl Lynn, who writes about what she wishes someone would have told her before losing her father to suicide. We want to thank Cheryl for sharing her words on how a death following a suicide is so much different than that of a natural death.
“Daddy, these are the things I wish you would have told me before you took your life…”
“Even when I am not alone, I am alone. I wonder why I am relevant. ...
A Walk Down Memory Lane
Why is it so hard to take a walk down memory lane? I spent the weekend immersed in packing, as we recently decided to move out of the house I swore would be my "forever home." I set a goal to go through all of the boxes in storage, swearing I would not have it hauled to another home. I knew exactly what was in the majority of the boxes. Baby items that are no longer needed, house decor that doesn't have a place, sporting equipment that hasn't ...
Reflecting on Five Years without my Dad
Five years have passed since losing my dad to suicide. It is often hard to believe that so much time has passed, while other times it feels like just yesterday. My dad's death has been the most life changing experience thus far. It introduced me to a new level of pain; a level that I never knew existed. The year of firsts, as we survivors of a suicide loss call it, was a difficult one. Not because of his death, but because of my inability ...