According to Merriam-Webster, denial can be defined as, "The refusal to admit the truth or reality of something." Somewhere along the way, we have labeled denial a bad thing. If you are denying something, then you clearly aren't dealing with it. The Stages of Grief, which has to date been considered the roadmap for grief, lists denial as the first stage that one goes through following the loss of a loved one. Before tackling denial, let me first ...
I am Not Accepting My Dad’s Suicide, and That’s Ok.
This week, we welcome Sarah who writes about finding peace without finding acceptance. Do you know what the Stages of Grief were intended for? I felt this was the perfect opportunity to offer a little education on the topic. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross interviewed individuals in a hospital who were dying from a terminal illness. These are the stages THEY went through prior to dying. Makes a lot of sense, right? The stages were never meant for survivors ...
What is Acceptance?
As a grief therapist and survivor of a suicide loss I often struggle with the word acceptance. I have yet to meet another survivor who doesn't ask me about acceptance. Suicide leaves you in a state of disbelief. How did this happen? And most importantly, "How did this happen to ME?" When I am asked about acceptance, I often turn the question around, asking the person what acceptance means to them. In my opinion, acceptance means something ...
Changing How We View The Stages of Grief
The below article was written by Darci Sims, a bereaved parent and child, a grief management specialist, a nationally certified thanatologist, a certified pastoral bereavement specialist, and a licensed psychotherapist and hypnotherapist. I have always challenged the The Stages of Grief, arguing that they do not apply to those who have tragically lost a loved one. Darci, challenges the way we view grief in the article below.
The New Language ...
The Weight of Guilt after a Loss by Suicide
One question that I have been asked by many survivors is, "When will the guilt end?" I see the desperation in their eyes, and remember the overwhelming weight that I carried on my own shoulders following the loss of my father. We question what we could have done differently to prevent the tragic outcome that has become our reality. I have spent a great deal of time thinking about the element of guilt. I have written many posts on the topic, ...