Offering hope, comfort and support for survivors of suicide loss.
Leaning into the pain after a suicide loss is not easy to do. We find ourselves in a place we have never been before. The world around us suddenly feels unfamiliar. The people around us seem like strangers. After the shock wears off, and the distractions end, we find ourselves experiencing a new kind of pain. A pain that has more intensity than anything we have felt before. It is uncomfortable, it is unfamiliar, and it is scary. Our first ...
As a survivor of a suicide loss I know the isolating feeling that accompanies the loss. People don't know what to say, so often times they don't say anything at all. Translation to the person who just lost someone to suicide: "I don't care." "Are they judging me or the person I lost?" "I am all alone." "Nobody will understand so why should I even talk about it." These beliefs often lead to isolation, and I will tell you one thing we actually ...
As a survivor, I think it can be hard to not allow your loved ones' final act to trump the life that they lived. For it is that last act that caused us the pain that we feel in the present. Combine that with the stigma and shame of suicide and suddenly the memories that occurred before their death become a distant memory. I love talking about my dad. It reminds me of the time we had prior to his death. It reminds me of who I am, and where I ...
When I lost my dad to suicide I spent a great deal of time running from the pain of suicide. The interesting thing about my pain was that it took time to actually hit. I always refer to this time as "the distracted period." We often think we are doing pretty well. Then something happens. The bottom falls out, the ground we are standing on no longer seems sturdy. The pain becomes intense and feels overwhelming. We don't want to feel it. ...
A new fear is created when you lose a loved one to suicide. The fear that you will lose someone else in the same manner. My grandmother died of cancer, yet I don't fear that someone else will meet the same fate. With suicide, the same is not true. Suicide creates a new type of anxiety, one that wasn't present prior. As a survivor four years out, I can say that it does get easier, yet it never goes away. This week, we welcome Andrea who ...
