Five years have passed since losing my dad to suicide. It is often hard to believe that so much time has passed, while other times it feels like just yesterday. My dad's death has been the most life changing experience thus far. It introduced me to a new level of pain; a level that I never knew existed. The year of firsts, as we survivors of a suicide loss call it, was a difficult one. Not because of his death, but because of my inability ...
How has it been Five Years?
It's been five years since I lost my dad to suicide. I often think to myself, "how has it been five years?" And that's when it hits me. That gut wrenching knot in my stomach reminding me that my dad took his life. A reminder that he's gone. A reminder that I will never again hear his voice or receive one of his hugs. Those hugs were best. Sometimes while talking to my husband I find myself asking him, "did that really happen?" Because it ...
Conversations about Suicide
This week we welcome guest blogger, Deborah Greene, who lost her father to suicide on April 20th, 2015. She offers her reflection on the last conversation she had with her father prior to his death. We thank Deborah for a sharing a piece of her grief journey with us.
In one of the last conversations that I had with my father, I recounted an episode of severe depression that he’d experienced when I was a child. He had left his job after ...
Thinking About What Could Have Been After Suicide
Fairly often, I find myself wondering what life would be like if my dad were still alive. It’s hard not to think about what could have been, though I know that’s a slippery slope.
I wonder how my dad would have liked being a grandfather. I wonder what memories would have come with him meeting my daughter for the first time or spending holidays together with a baby.
As I sit in a weekly music class with my daughter, I watch as another child ...
Three Years After Losing Dad to Suicide
Three years ago today, I lost my father to suicide. As I write that I still feel this sense of disbelief as I question, "How could this have happened in my family?" It still just doesn't seem real. So much has happened in just three short years after losing dad to suicide.
Being a survivor is now a part of my story. It is not something I would have chosen to be a part of my story, but I suppose we do not always want the hand that is dealt ...