Being a survivor of a suicide loss is hard, there is no question about it. We are left with an unfinished story. We struggle to find people who understand the pain we are feeling. We work to make sense of this new world we are living in. We all know how difficult it is. So, why are we so hard on ourselves? I often hear other survivors of a suicide loss talk about their struggles. They talk about their flaws in their ability to grieve, ...
Are we Weak?
What picture comes to mind when I use the word "weak"? When I think about the word, I struggle to find an image. Weak is difficult to define, yet as survivors of a suicide loss we often use this word to define ourselves. Countless times I have heard another survivor call themselves "weak" noting that they struggle to get through the day. To me, that is the definition of strength not weakness. It takes strength to get up. It takes strength ...
Change after Suicide
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ― Lao TzuChange is inevitable in this life. Change after suicide is impossible to avoid. Whether we want it or not, change will occur and our lives will never be as they once were. For me, my life was forever changed on December 27th, 2011, when my father decided ...
Silence is Golden
Silence is golden. Have you heard this popular quote? While this quote is fairly popular, silence is something that our society is often not comfortable with. We assume that silence is a bad thing, often interrupting these quiet moments with conversation. I know all too well the feeling of isolation that follow a death by suicide. Friends and family stop calling as they report not knowing what to say. So instead, they just say nothing. I ...
Breathe in, Breath Out. The Power of Our Breath.
For this week's motivational Monday, I would love for everyone to take the time to focus on their breath. Have you ever experienced panic or anxiety? I don't know anyone who hasn't. When we experience anxiety, our breath becomes shallow. The lack of oxygen to the brain, increases our heart rate which ultimately causes the panic that we experience. In that moment it can be so difficult to stop our brain from spiraling and redirect our focus ...